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IN
THE DISTANCE
if you've ever entered a space, gone
towards working “within the system” because you did not know
how else to enter.
if you've ever gone towards corporateland, a profession or even a romance
that you knew, from the beginning, you had no business entering, but did
anyway.
Grann mwen te fè l - my Gran had. Then you'll understand some of
the stuff i've been talking about 'cause once upon a time, She too, with
her open valley spirit and temperament had opened herself up to enfold
strangers from Europe; Her land, Mother Africa has never recovered.
Well, once upon a time, i was the woman following the wrong drummer;
the dance was traumatic, the music made chaotic. This is called, In The
Distance.
IN THE DISTANCE
in the distance, way off in the distance, i heard his drum.... i wanted
to follow it because i believed i could return to me, after the dance.
i was confident, the dance would not change me. in fact, i'm good for
him. Blithely i went to him.
Now, now i know.
Every dance molds me. Every moment i am new. There is never a going back,
ever. Every new adventure or self-assigned mission changes me. Each experience
shifts me.
There were few harmonious times. Years. And, after years of confusion,
of swirling in the vortexes of emotional and cerebral unfaithfulness,
like, this traumatic chorus, i stood still one day, and, in the silence,
heard...the drum within.
A faint, flickering sound at first since the habit of doubt had ripped
my confidence apart during our obsessive trance.
Now, now i know.
Now i only hear the beat of my soul's desires and unwaveringly give my
will, my lifeforce to that drummer. We are one, my desires and i. There
is no separation, no violence, i am not alone. There is no effort in following
the sounds, the lights, the loves i am.
The beat nourishes and a song unfolds. i am the music.
Now, now i know. |
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